Not Wanting Children - Estelle

Today, Estelle, co-founder of Hair Yeah, talks to us about her decision not to have children: a well-thought-out choice, but one that isn’t always respected:

Not wanting children 🌞 

"The mental load on sentimental life / future on couple or single / having children, is really a n-1 of family dinner conversations where no one understands our point of view.

Personally, I underwent a permanent sterilization, which meant I could no longer have children. Of course, my parents didn't understand (and still don't). I left the man I'd been living with for 8 years and with whom I was due to get married, so you can imagine the atmosphere at family dinners...

What could be more disconcerting than a FAMILY meal where you feel judged and misunderstood by the people you love the most?

I’m 29 years old, and I decided a very long time ago that I wouldn’t have children in my life.
This decision is not understood by all the members of my family who are over 50.
They experienced immense happiness in building their own families and raising their children. It’s impossible for them to imagine that I would want to miss out on that “happiness.”

During these long meals, I have too often heard the famous :

"you're too young, you'll change your mind".

"it's selfish

"you'll see, when it's YOUR children, it's not the same".

"you are a woman, you were made for this".

I ended up noticing that in the end, they were just afraid for me... afraid I'd make the "wrong" decision, afraid I'd regret my choice...

I’m so happy I was able to answer their questions and reassure them about what I wanted for myself… in MY life.
Showing them that you can find fulfillment and thrive in ways other than through motherhood is one of my little victories.

I also feel they are now more open and tolerant of the fact that we are all different, and that everyone has their own way of achieving fulfillment in life."